


Not All It's Quacked Up to Be

by SesuRescue (Kigachan)



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Incest, Just a tiny bit of kidnapping in the morning, Mom Papyrus, Multi, Sibling Incest, baby ducks, mother's day fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-05-06 05:32:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14635122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kigachan/pseuds/SesuRescue
Summary: Papyrus comes home claiming to be a mother, and everyone's confused until he shows off his children.





	Not All It's Quacked Up to Be

**Author's Note:**

> Yesterday I thought to myself 'wowie tomorrow's Mother's Day, should I write something?', and instead of picking the more obvious choices for a Mother's Day fic I instead wrote about Papyrus bringing home stray animals and calling himself a mother.

It was a beautiful, spring day outside. The birds were singing, the flowers were blooming,--

“GRILLBY! SANS! I’VE DONE IT!”

\--and Papyrus was screaming, apparently.

He burst through the front door with the sort of grandiose entrance that was expected of him, catching Grillby off guard right as he was setting down a plate of breakfast for a snoozing Sans on the couch. The plate missed the coffee table by a few inches and fell towards the ground, but right before it could hit the floor blue magic enveloped it, flipping the plate upward and placing it gently on the carpet.

“didn’t know you were so clumsy, grillbz,” Sans quipped, cracking open an eye socket.

Grillby huffed, pinning Sans with one of his Stares of Displeasure (nearly indistinguishable from his other gazes if you weren’t used to being on the receiving end of them), before giving his full attention to Papyrus, who was still shaking with barely-contained excitement. “...What did you do, Papy?”

“yeah paps, what’s up?”

“I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE FINALLY REALIZED MY TRUE DREAM!”

Sans sat up at that, leaning forward in anticipation. “wait, did undyne finally let you into the guard?”

“NO NO, SANS, NOTHING LIKE THAT,” Papyrus said, waving him off. “I’VE BECOME A MOTHER!”

Silence filled the house as Sans and Grillby mulled over Papyrus’ words in their head. Mother? Papyrus?

They both glanced at Papyrus’ torso, slack-jawed, before turning back to themselves, speaking in hurried, hushed tones to themselves.

“was it you? i’ve been on the receivin’ end for papyrus for a few weeks now so it wasn’t me.”

“...No no, i don’t even think we’re compatible in that way.”

“soul sex?”

“...When was the last time we did that, his heat maybe?”

“that hasn’t happened since--”

“ARE YOU TWO QUITE DONE YET?” The whispers immediately ceased as they focused back on Papyrus. “THANK YOU. AS I WAS GOING TO SAY BEFORE YOU TWO _RUDELY_ INTERRUPTED ME--I HAVE NOT BECOME A MOTHER THROUGH THE USUAL METHODS OF PROCREATION AND SEXUAL REPRODUCTION, BUT INSTEAD I HAVE...ADOPTED!”

“...Papyrus, that’s wonderful, but don’t you think we all should’ve talked about this before you made the decision?” Grillby asked. He gestured for Sans to move over before sitting down, taking his glasses off to wipe them with the bottom of his apron. “Children are a huge responsibility and very expensive. We’ll have to make sure that we can provide for them and give them a stable household, and that requires a lot of conversation and planning.”

“YES, THAT WOULD BE THE CASE WITH A MONSTER CHILD, AND I WOULD’VE COME TO YOU BOTH BEFORE THEN, BUT THIS ADOPTION WAS A LITTLE DIFFERENT BECAUSE I HAVE ADOPTED--” Papyrus gently pulled his scarf from his neck and sat it down on the table. He lifted up a folded part of the fabric, revealing a pile of small, sleeping baby ducks. “--DUCKLINGS!”

Grillby gasped softly with a hand over his mouth and Sans sighed in exasperation, having dealt with this particular brand of Papyrus nonsense many times. “i thought we talked about this before, you can’t just go uprootin’ baby animals from their homes and takin’ them home. don’t you think their actual mother is missing them?”

Papyrus crossed his arms with a scowl. “ I AM THEIR MOTHER, SANS! BESIDES, WHEN I FOUND THEM THEY WERE JUST HATCHING AND THEIR BIOLOGICAL MOTHER WAS NOWHERE TO BE FOUND. OBVIOUSLY, SHE DIDN’T CARE ABOUT THEM ANYMORE; WHY ELSE WOULD SHE LEAVE HER NEST UNATTENDED? THEY COULD’VE BEEN EATEN SANS, SO I DID THE RIGHT THING AND TOOK THEM UNDER MY WING, SO TO SPEAK.”

“oh my god pap, she was probably just trying to find some food for when they hatched. grillby, you’re the voice of reason, please talk some sense into him.”

They both turned to hear what Grillby would say, but were surprised to see that he was stuck in the same position he had been in when Papyrus had first revealed the ducks. His flames were lively, crackling excitedly as he struggled to keep his breath even. “...C-cute…” He finally whispered.

Papyrus brightened at the comment, scooping up one of the ducklings and maneuvering around the table so that he was in front of Grillby. He got down to his knees and nudged Grillby’s hands open, carefully setting the duckling down so that it was sitting in the palms of his hands. Despite all of the moving around, the duckling barely opened its eyes, fluttering its body slightly before snuggling down in the warm flames around it. Papyrus could’ve sworn that he had seen a small stream of lava leak from underneath Grillby’s glasses down his cheek, but it disappeared almost as fast as Papyrus had found it. “SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?”

Grillby nodded absently, keeping his eyes on the duckling in his hands. He seemed to have gone almost fully mute, soft crackles emitting from his flames and open mouth instead of words as his fingers smoothed over the small, ruffled feathers.

Sans, however, was unaffected. He got to his feet, mirroring Papyrus’ previous stance with crossed arms. “you gotta take ‘em back.”

As Sans expected, Papyrus was less than eager to cooperate. He stomped his foot into the carpet with a whine. “SANS, MOTHER KNOWS BEST.”

“you’re not their mother pap!”

“JUST BECAUSE I DID NOT BIRTH THEM DOESN’T MEAN I AM NOT THEIR MOTHER SANS, AND QUITE FRANKLY I AM SHOCKED AND APPALLED THAT YOU WOULD BE SO CALLOUS AS TO INSINUATE THAT ADOPTIVE MOTHERS ARE LESSER THAN BLOOD MOTHERS.”

“that’s not what i--”

“SHOCKED. AND. APPALLED.”

Sans stared at Papyrus dumbfounded, before bringing both hands to his face. He took a deep breath, and then another, and then a third one for good measure before facing Papyrus again. “yeah, so i’m gonna take these ducks back to their mother and then i’m gonna pretend like this entire day didn’t happen.” He gathered up Papyrus’ scarf and gently moved it so that it laid flat against his torso like a sling and tied it, giving Papyrus a stern look over his shoulder that suggested he not interfere.

When Sans was done he turned to Grillby, eyeing the last duckling. “gonna need that little guy too, grillbz.”

Grillby looked up with a small frown. “...I could carry them with us, they just look really nice and comfortable and I would hate to disturb them.”

“okay, whatever, let’s go then.”

The three of them left their house with Papyrus in the lead, soft snow crunching noisily underneath his feet to mask his grumbled protests. Sans, either not caring or flat out ignoring him, followed closely behind, and Grillby brought up the rear, his upper half held rigid and straight as he nearly tiptoed through the snow in order to not jostle his feathered companion.

After a few minutes of walking through the forest, a loud honking sound echoed through the trees, making them all stop in their steps.

“was that…”

As if to answer, the duckling began to squirm in the sling, cheeping happily.

“T-THAT DOESN’T AUTOMATICALLY MEAN IT’S THEIR MOM!” Papyrus stuttered, shying away from Sans’ ‘I-told-you-so’ stare.

“pretty sure that’s their mom, and she sounds pissed. i’m not really looking to stir up any _fowl_ play here, so we should leave them here for her to find.”

Sans spun around on his feet, searching for a suitable place to leave the ducks since he wasn’t cruel enough to leave them in the snow to freeze to death. He quickly found a large, hollowed-out stump and walked over, happy to find that the bottom had already been outfitted with a small layer of twigs, leaves, and bark. “okay, time to say goodbye.”

Papyrus sighed, shoulders slumped as he untied the scarf and brought it over to the stump, lowering it so the ducks could plop out safely on the bottom. “WELL, I MAY HAVE NOT BEEN YOUR MOM FOR VERY LONG, BUT I LOVED YOU ALL THE SAME. TAKE CARE DAISY, DON’T LET YOUR BROTHER PAPYRUS JR. PUSH YOU AROUND. AND YOU, DAN, BE NICE OKAY; DON’T GO SQUAWKING UP A STORM WHEN CLAIRE IS TRYING TO SLEEP.”

“when did you have time to name them all,” Sans muttered. Shaking his head, he turned to Grillby, who was still holding onto the last duckling. “hey tall, dark, and flaming, you too. we can’t keep them.”

“...I suppose you’re right,” Grillby breathed. He peered down into the stomp where the other four ducklings had settled into a small circle, ruffled feathers bunching up as they squawked up into the air. He kneeled down to one knee and carefully sat his duckling in the middle of the pile, stroking his feathers one last time. “...Papa will miss you, Caroline. Grow up strong okay?”

Grillby sniffled as he got back to his feet, wiping quickly at his eyes with his sleeve, and Papyrus took that moment to embrace him fully, rubbing large circles on his back. “A PARENT’S JOB IS A THANKLESS ONE, BUT FULFILLING IN IT’S OWN RIGHT, DON’T YOU THINK?”

“...Y-yeah, I just, gosh they grow up so quickly,” Grillby said, returning the embrace with a quiet sob.

Sans watched the exchange for a few moments before leaving them to their moment, vowing to buy a few houseplants or something to prevent this from happening again.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Feel free to bother me at my NSFW Tumblr: [ Sesurescue ](https://Sesurescue.tumblr.com)


End file.
